by Francesco Cagliardi0
‘I am not a loser’
This book talks about this boy called Barry and his last name is Loser. He never minded being called Barry Loser but since Darren Darrenofski joined school, he’s been completely ruining his life about it. Darren drinks this drink called Fronkle. Every time he drinks one bottle he does a burp in Barry’s ear that lasts for about an hour and then throwing ring pulls at Barry.
Barry’s best friend is called Bunky. Him & Bunky make up the keel (a cool way to say cool) gang. Basically, the keel gang just likes to annoy Mrs. Trumpet Face (their neighbor with two twin kids) and watch Future Ratboy (Bunky & Barry’s favorite TV show). to annoy Mrs. Trumpet Face they knock on her door and then run away and then phoning asking to speak to PooPoo. One time they even painted themselves blue when it was snowing and knocked on Mrs Trumpet Face’s door. When she came out she saw them and thought they were freezing in coldness but when she gave Bunky ‘The Kiss Of Life’ they ran off screaming ‘TRUMPETTT FACEEEE!’. At lunch times the keel gang practices their play called vending machine mum.
Barry tries to invent plans to make Darren stop ruining his life. First he tries putting a fake nose on to look keel. Second he tries putting stilts. Third he transforms his vending machine mum to A GIANT ROBOT. It didn’t work. Next, he makes a new haircut and last he tells Darren that there’s a new flavor of fronkle coming out with the flavour of Banana. When Darren hears it he treats Barry nice and doesn’t bully him.
The Talent Contest
Then it was the time for the talent show and the keel gang decided to do the VMM (short for vending machine mum). They thought they were going to win so they didn’t even practice. In the talent contest started a boy that was talking about the history of sandwiches when a girl fell into a trapdoor under the stage. Barry wanted to save her so went in the trapdoor but did not notice that it was their turn.